SNAKES!
Lotsa trickin but ain't no treatin!!! Well, not really, all the boys was good hearted an would share anythin with tha others. Buster jes t'weren't no trickster but that dadburn Walter and Howard was sumthin else, I tell ya! Lil Jessie liked a good joke as well as tha next feller but was closer to Buster in his thinkin.
One day all tha boys were gathered round when ole Doc Stan come up to tha house. Doc dun showed their Pa's an sum of tha local fellers that logged therabouts sum new fangled snake bite cure. Had to do with electricatin a body with a gizmo Doc invented. Ole Doc really took a shine to them 4 boys an when he left he dun give Walter one of them gadgets but tole him not to tell cause he was sellin em an all. Tha thang had a battree in it and boy would it shock the fool outa ya. Walter dun got saddled with a egg sucking ole hound so when he caught him in that hen house, he codded that durn hound with it and did he ever let out a howl an lit a shuck. Hightailed it plum outa the county with his tail between his laigs.
So Walter knew what that gizmo would do to a feller an he jes had to prank sumbudy to see what it would do to em an get a laugh at that. All tha boys was over by tha A & P gettin on toward the sodie fountain at tha Drugstore when they seed a bunch of boys that come to town from Plum Bayou. They all got to talkin an walked on in an sat right down by tha big picture winder thar at Leake's Drugstore. Howard was over by tha picture winder an the rest of tha boys was all sittin round bout tha table when they got to jawin on the gizmo that Doc was showin folks that he invented. All of em was wonderin what in the heck it did to cure a snakebite, spider bite, waspers or any other type of venomous critter. Well, as Walter pulled that gizmo outa hisn pocket; he accidentally turned the thang on. All them boys got to scramblin but Howard was stuck behind the table thar an jes wadn't fast nuf to get outa the way. Well, Walter didn't know the gizmo was on an was jes scarin the boys a mite when he touched Howard with that gizmo. Howard bout went plum thru Leake's picture winder an bounced offa it like a rubber ball. Hisn eyes rolled up like winder shades an he went to doin a St. Vidas dance. He hopped round thar a hoopin an hollerin like he was kilt. Walter dun tole him he was sorry but Howard 'tweren't in no forgiving mood right bout then. After a spell thangs settled down an Walter dun tole Howard he was mighty sorry agin an bought him a cherry coke for makin up. That gizmo shor nuff worked wonders for all tha folks in them parts when they got bit by sumthin that Ajax wouldn't wash off. Walter tole tha story bout his egg suckin hound an did admit that he was wonderin what it would do to a feller an was right proud his fren Howard was tha guninea pig. He shor nuf was a whirlin dervish for a spell thar but he really didn't mean to spark Howard. Howard didn't say nary word bout the sparkin incident an tha boys had a tickle in private but didn't take no guff bout teasin Howard bout it. If you wanted 4 boys to tussle, jes keep teasin Howard bout the sparkin.
What y'all don't know is Howard would catch anythin that crawled; rattlers, copperheads, cottonmouths or water moccasins; didn't make no never mind; Howard weren't skeered a bit of em. Would catch em behind tha haid or tha tail; he didn't care.
All tha boys Pa's got together fer a barn raisin an at tha same time had tha boys plow up a field fer Howard's Pa. Walter dun sprung up a bit and drove anythin on wheels like Buster did; so he up an got on tha tractor.
All tha work was a goin jes fine and wimmen folk dun cooked up one heck of a dinner. The dinner bell was a ringin an them boys lit out to tha feed table like greased lightnin. Howard et a bite an excused hisself to tha outhouse. This un of Howard's Pa had a half moon an sum stars carved in tha door an was a 2 holer an even had a ole Sears and Roebuck catalog fer company. Mostly thay had corn shucks an corn cobs an thay got a lil rashly at times. Tha boys sneaked off behind a stand of Hickory trees an lit up sum Prince Albert ole Dump give em over at Wright last week when thay deliverd sum cord wood over thar. Dump was ole man MacNeil's hired man that had ben with him forever! Good feller an one heck of a fence builder too. Him an Buster built a quarter mile square of fence last summer fore Buster left out fer a spell to see his real Pap in Ohio. Anyhow, Howard dun went out an caught hisself a Bull snake. Looks like a rattler but harmless he says. Eats other snakes is what he does says Howard. When Walter clum back on that tractor an sit down on that seat like a big dog ya know; that snake dun crawled out from under tha seat an started to crawl up Walter's britches laig. He come a loose like he was shot outa cannon! Dun turned white, green and bout 4 shades of purple an was a spittin and fumin an lookin fer his shotgun. Ole Howard an tha boys were fit to be tied! Thay laughed till thay cried; jes dubbled over an lost thar air even. The men folks cum over bout that time when thay heared all tha commotion an thay bellered and jes had a high time on Walter. Well, Howard asked Walter ifn he was alright as he dun skunt his shin and elbow comin offa that tractor. Walter took it in good stride an tole Howard he dun got him good. Everybody laughed an then went on back to work.
Buster dun tole y'all bout tha boys puttin that garter snake in Miz Goetz's desk drawer at tha schoolhouse. The woman swooned an went inta a dead faint fer a minit thar. Tha boys was always inta sumthin an snakes seemed to be it that year. Buster took the boys from tha scouts canoein on tha Buffalo. It is tha last wild river in tha United States an he knew it like tha back of hisn hand. Injun feller he met up with taught him every twist and turn an whirlpool in it. Knew all the best fishin an swimmin holes ta boot. Well, this one weekend thay all gatherd up an took ta carryin thar canoes ta tha water. Well, this one lil feller jes couldn't hold up his end an that dang canoe was light as a feather too. Feller from school named Charley jes had a fit cause that boy couldn't tote his half of tha load an thay couldn't git thar canoe ta tha water let alone paddle with tha rest of the group. Buster jumped outa his canoe an run on over an grabbed a holt of that canoe an run off to tha river an set er in that water an hollered for tha boys to git in as time was a wastin.
Them two was right comical. Thay couldn't git that canoe to go in tha right direction an was a turnin an twistin every which a way. Well, finally, Buster got em lined out an thay was a movin along purty fair when all of a sudden the biggest ruckus you ever heard an saw was comin from them two boys. Charley was paddlin up a strom an was goin nowhar. Tha lil feller was a hittin at sumthin in tha bottom of thar canoe and cryin and hollerin to all git out. Charley hollered over ta Buster that a snake dun dropped inta the canoe from a limb thay was goin under an tha lil feller was tryin to kill it with his paddle. The lil feller didn't paddle worth a wooden nickle an he hit tha limb an knocked that water moccasin in tha canoe with em. How he dun that Buster didn't know but it was shor a sight to see. That lil feller wore that paddle to a nub and knocked holes all in tha bottom of that canoe. Tha canoe was a sinkin, Charley was a cussin, Buster was a laughin and tha lil feller was hollerin and cryin skeered to death of that snake. Well thay all ended up in tha water; snake went one way an tha boys another.
Water wadn't but waist deep so thay waded on out. That was tha end of canoein for them two. Thay had to drag out what was left of tha canoe and jes sit on tha bank till everybody cum back. Lil feller's mama come an got him an took him on back to Little Rock. Charley was all huffed up cause he didn't have no fun an now no partner an no canoe to boot. Jes sat in camp tha rest of tha weekend. Buster said he never would forgit that sight though; that lil feller jes a bangin holes in that canoe tryin ta hit tha snake an Charley cussin and paddlin goin nowhar but in circles. Too funny he said.
Now I got one on Jessie. ya know Jessie is tha littlest of tha 4 boys but let me tell ya, dynamite comes in small packages. Jessie jes don't git in no trouble unlessen tha other 3 git him in it. Tha boy will probably grow up to be a lawyer or sumthin. Smart as whip too. Jessie's people are mighty fine too, salt of tha earth. His mama is a real Southern Lady and his Pa, well, no finer man in tha cuntry. Didn't allow no Klan on his place neither. Wadn't skeered of em a bit; knowed em all anyhow. Jessie was drivn fore any of us. Had an uncle that liked ta take a snort or 2 an had Jessie drive him round an would give Jessie a quarter to do it. One Christmas he give Jessie a 5 dollar bill. He shared it with us boys too. Course his Aunt an his mama didn't know nuthin bout all that an not even to this day. Jessie didn't like no snake! He knowed how Buster felt that time when Buster was huntin and walkin the canal bank on his grandpa's farm an seed that cottonmouth. That snake come right after Buster an Buster had his shotgun with him and jes up an pulled tha trigger. Buster was carryin it pointed to tha ground he said an jes pulled tha trigger without thinkin. Said he felt tha wind on his laig as tha shot went by an hit that snake that was bout to bite him. Anyway, Jessie went on a campin trip his mama fixed up fer him. Some how nother us boys didn't go along an that was plum out of tha ordinary cause thay dun everythin together. Jessie said all of tha fellers thar went fishin an jes messin round a bit till after supper an then went ta thar tents an sleeping bags. Like I said, Jessie don't like no snake. One of them boys figured he'd pull a trick on lil Jessie. Thay dun caught a eel on tha trotline an brought it on back to camp. Thay figured to pick on tha littlest feller thar but that was thar first mistake. When thay started to put that eel on Jessie in his sleeping bag; Jessie cum outa thar like a duck on a June bug. That was thar second an last mistake! Ole Jessie dun had his fire lit and he took to thrashin them boys like Sherman went thru Georgia. He dun whooped the boy with tha eel real good an proper an the other one with him got a poke or two fore he took off a runnin. Rest of them boys figured out real quick that Jessie wasn't one to be trifled with. Jessie said he didn't know what happened to that eel but the feller that tried to put it on him left tha next day with a bloody nose, busted lip and 2 balck eyes. Boy dun run inta a bobcat huh. Ole Jessie could hold his own, I tell ya. His frens could stand good fer that. Ben with ole Jessie too long; all their lives.
Well that was purty much for tha snakes that year, ceptin when Howard dun put 3 rattlers in his mama's Fridgeadaire. Said he was coolin em down so's they wouldn't wiggle as much. Liked to give his mama a heart attack. Believe supper was late that nite. Howard didn't do that no more, I tell ya. His Pa dun tole Howard he was a goin to tha woodshed if that happened agin.
Reckon tha boys will be up ta sum mischief agin soon but thay is real good boys. Walter will probably a President sum day an Howard doctorin sumthin or sumone. Jessie lawyerin an Buster a writin. We'll see; thay gots lots of livin to do till them days cum round. Days a endin an night birds are callin an tha larks in tha field sangin. Lightnin bugs a glowin tonite an stars shinin bright. Lord was good to us today.
One day all tha boys were gathered round when ole Doc Stan come up to tha house. Doc dun showed their Pa's an sum of tha local fellers that logged therabouts sum new fangled snake bite cure. Had to do with electricatin a body with a gizmo Doc invented. Ole Doc really took a shine to them 4 boys an when he left he dun give Walter one of them gadgets but tole him not to tell cause he was sellin em an all. Tha thang had a battree in it and boy would it shock the fool outa ya. Walter dun got saddled with a egg sucking ole hound so when he caught him in that hen house, he codded that durn hound with it and did he ever let out a howl an lit a shuck. Hightailed it plum outa the county with his tail between his laigs.
So Walter knew what that gizmo would do to a feller an he jes had to prank sumbudy to see what it would do to em an get a laugh at that. All tha boys was over by tha A & P gettin on toward the sodie fountain at tha Drugstore when they seed a bunch of boys that come to town from Plum Bayou. They all got to talkin an walked on in an sat right down by tha big picture winder thar at Leake's Drugstore. Howard was over by tha picture winder an the rest of tha boys was all sittin round bout tha table when they got to jawin on the gizmo that Doc was showin folks that he invented. All of em was wonderin what in the heck it did to cure a snakebite, spider bite, waspers or any other type of venomous critter. Well, as Walter pulled that gizmo outa hisn pocket; he accidentally turned the thang on. All them boys got to scramblin but Howard was stuck behind the table thar an jes wadn't fast nuf to get outa the way. Well, Walter didn't know the gizmo was on an was jes scarin the boys a mite when he touched Howard with that gizmo. Howard bout went plum thru Leake's picture winder an bounced offa it like a rubber ball. Hisn eyes rolled up like winder shades an he went to doin a St. Vidas dance. He hopped round thar a hoopin an hollerin like he was kilt. Walter dun tole him he was sorry but Howard 'tweren't in no forgiving mood right bout then. After a spell thangs settled down an Walter dun tole Howard he was mighty sorry agin an bought him a cherry coke for makin up. That gizmo shor nuff worked wonders for all tha folks in them parts when they got bit by sumthin that Ajax wouldn't wash off. Walter tole tha story bout his egg suckin hound an did admit that he was wonderin what it would do to a feller an was right proud his fren Howard was tha guninea pig. He shor nuf was a whirlin dervish for a spell thar but he really didn't mean to spark Howard. Howard didn't say nary word bout the sparkin incident an tha boys had a tickle in private but didn't take no guff bout teasin Howard bout it. If you wanted 4 boys to tussle, jes keep teasin Howard bout the sparkin.
What y'all don't know is Howard would catch anythin that crawled; rattlers, copperheads, cottonmouths or water moccasins; didn't make no never mind; Howard weren't skeered a bit of em. Would catch em behind tha haid or tha tail; he didn't care.
All tha boys Pa's got together fer a barn raisin an at tha same time had tha boys plow up a field fer Howard's Pa. Walter dun sprung up a bit and drove anythin on wheels like Buster did; so he up an got on tha tractor.
All tha work was a goin jes fine and wimmen folk dun cooked up one heck of a dinner. The dinner bell was a ringin an them boys lit out to tha feed table like greased lightnin. Howard et a bite an excused hisself to tha outhouse. This un of Howard's Pa had a half moon an sum stars carved in tha door an was a 2 holer an even had a ole Sears and Roebuck catalog fer company. Mostly thay had corn shucks an corn cobs an thay got a lil rashly at times. Tha boys sneaked off behind a stand of Hickory trees an lit up sum Prince Albert ole Dump give em over at Wright last week when thay deliverd sum cord wood over thar. Dump was ole man MacNeil's hired man that had ben with him forever! Good feller an one heck of a fence builder too. Him an Buster built a quarter mile square of fence last summer fore Buster left out fer a spell to see his real Pap in Ohio. Anyhow, Howard dun went out an caught hisself a Bull snake. Looks like a rattler but harmless he says. Eats other snakes is what he does says Howard. When Walter clum back on that tractor an sit down on that seat like a big dog ya know; that snake dun crawled out from under tha seat an started to crawl up Walter's britches laig. He come a loose like he was shot outa cannon! Dun turned white, green and bout 4 shades of purple an was a spittin and fumin an lookin fer his shotgun. Ole Howard an tha boys were fit to be tied! Thay laughed till thay cried; jes dubbled over an lost thar air even. The men folks cum over bout that time when thay heared all tha commotion an thay bellered and jes had a high time on Walter. Well, Howard asked Walter ifn he was alright as he dun skunt his shin and elbow comin offa that tractor. Walter took it in good stride an tole Howard he dun got him good. Everybody laughed an then went on back to work.
Buster dun tole y'all bout tha boys puttin that garter snake in Miz Goetz's desk drawer at tha schoolhouse. The woman swooned an went inta a dead faint fer a minit thar. Tha boys was always inta sumthin an snakes seemed to be it that year. Buster took the boys from tha scouts canoein on tha Buffalo. It is tha last wild river in tha United States an he knew it like tha back of hisn hand. Injun feller he met up with taught him every twist and turn an whirlpool in it. Knew all the best fishin an swimmin holes ta boot. Well, this one weekend thay all gatherd up an took ta carryin thar canoes ta tha water. Well, this one lil feller jes couldn't hold up his end an that dang canoe was light as a feather too. Feller from school named Charley jes had a fit cause that boy couldn't tote his half of tha load an thay couldn't git thar canoe ta tha water let alone paddle with tha rest of the group. Buster jumped outa his canoe an run on over an grabbed a holt of that canoe an run off to tha river an set er in that water an hollered for tha boys to git in as time was a wastin.
Them two was right comical. Thay couldn't git that canoe to go in tha right direction an was a turnin an twistin every which a way. Well, finally, Buster got em lined out an thay was a movin along purty fair when all of a sudden the biggest ruckus you ever heard an saw was comin from them two boys. Charley was paddlin up a strom an was goin nowhar. Tha lil feller was a hittin at sumthin in tha bottom of thar canoe and cryin and hollerin to all git out. Charley hollered over ta Buster that a snake dun dropped inta the canoe from a limb thay was goin under an tha lil feller was tryin to kill it with his paddle. The lil feller didn't paddle worth a wooden nickle an he hit tha limb an knocked that water moccasin in tha canoe with em. How he dun that Buster didn't know but it was shor a sight to see. That lil feller wore that paddle to a nub and knocked holes all in tha bottom of that canoe. Tha canoe was a sinkin, Charley was a cussin, Buster was a laughin and tha lil feller was hollerin and cryin skeered to death of that snake. Well thay all ended up in tha water; snake went one way an tha boys another.
Water wadn't but waist deep so thay waded on out. That was tha end of canoein for them two. Thay had to drag out what was left of tha canoe and jes sit on tha bank till everybody cum back. Lil feller's mama come an got him an took him on back to Little Rock. Charley was all huffed up cause he didn't have no fun an now no partner an no canoe to boot. Jes sat in camp tha rest of tha weekend. Buster said he never would forgit that sight though; that lil feller jes a bangin holes in that canoe tryin ta hit tha snake an Charley cussin and paddlin goin nowhar but in circles. Too funny he said.
Now I got one on Jessie. ya know Jessie is tha littlest of tha 4 boys but let me tell ya, dynamite comes in small packages. Jessie jes don't git in no trouble unlessen tha other 3 git him in it. Tha boy will probably grow up to be a lawyer or sumthin. Smart as whip too. Jessie's people are mighty fine too, salt of tha earth. His mama is a real Southern Lady and his Pa, well, no finer man in tha cuntry. Didn't allow no Klan on his place neither. Wadn't skeered of em a bit; knowed em all anyhow. Jessie was drivn fore any of us. Had an uncle that liked ta take a snort or 2 an had Jessie drive him round an would give Jessie a quarter to do it. One Christmas he give Jessie a 5 dollar bill. He shared it with us boys too. Course his Aunt an his mama didn't know nuthin bout all that an not even to this day. Jessie didn't like no snake! He knowed how Buster felt that time when Buster was huntin and walkin the canal bank on his grandpa's farm an seed that cottonmouth. That snake come right after Buster an Buster had his shotgun with him and jes up an pulled tha trigger. Buster was carryin it pointed to tha ground he said an jes pulled tha trigger without thinkin. Said he felt tha wind on his laig as tha shot went by an hit that snake that was bout to bite him. Anyway, Jessie went on a campin trip his mama fixed up fer him. Some how nother us boys didn't go along an that was plum out of tha ordinary cause thay dun everythin together. Jessie said all of tha fellers thar went fishin an jes messin round a bit till after supper an then went ta thar tents an sleeping bags. Like I said, Jessie don't like no snake. One of them boys figured he'd pull a trick on lil Jessie. Thay dun caught a eel on tha trotline an brought it on back to camp. Thay figured to pick on tha littlest feller thar but that was thar first mistake. When thay started to put that eel on Jessie in his sleeping bag; Jessie cum outa thar like a duck on a June bug. That was thar second an last mistake! Ole Jessie dun had his fire lit and he took to thrashin them boys like Sherman went thru Georgia. He dun whooped the boy with tha eel real good an proper an the other one with him got a poke or two fore he took off a runnin. Rest of them boys figured out real quick that Jessie wasn't one to be trifled with. Jessie said he didn't know what happened to that eel but the feller that tried to put it on him left tha next day with a bloody nose, busted lip and 2 balck eyes. Boy dun run inta a bobcat huh. Ole Jessie could hold his own, I tell ya. His frens could stand good fer that. Ben with ole Jessie too long; all their lives.
Well that was purty much for tha snakes that year, ceptin when Howard dun put 3 rattlers in his mama's Fridgeadaire. Said he was coolin em down so's they wouldn't wiggle as much. Liked to give his mama a heart attack. Believe supper was late that nite. Howard didn't do that no more, I tell ya. His Pa dun tole Howard he was a goin to tha woodshed if that happened agin.
Reckon tha boys will be up ta sum mischief agin soon but thay is real good boys. Walter will probably a President sum day an Howard doctorin sumthin or sumone. Jessie lawyerin an Buster a writin. We'll see; thay gots lots of livin to do till them days cum round. Days a endin an night birds are callin an tha larks in tha field sangin. Lightnin bugs a glowin tonite an stars shinin bright. Lord was good to us today.
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