Accidents
Buster dun had him a motor scooter accident on his Allstate when he hit the plumber, ole J. B. Locke, in tha side of his '58 Ford, 4 door sedan. It was green an white. Well ya see, Buster was a goin over ta this here feller's house fer a visit and it ain't recollected who was at fault. All is knowed is that it conked Buster's haid hard nuf ta dent tha entire side of that Ford. Throwed Buster higher than a Georgia pine, I tell ya. Tha amblance took Buster off ta tha horspital whar thay had him covered up with a white sheet. Well, Buster could hear all them folks a talkin and workin on him but he jes couldn't say nothing. He knowed he weren't hurt none but jes couldn't git on up from thar. That danged stretcher was right uncomfortable!
It dun tore up his motor scooter sumthin pitiful an put Buster in mind of bein right fractious bout that. He dun worked hard ta earn nuf money ta buy it an now it was busted up real good. Rolled an throwed many a paper fer it fer shor.
Whilst Buster was a layin thar, sum fellers cum by and says tha doctor was a cummin with Buster's mama. She was a workin out at Knoll's cleaners fer sum extra hard cash an thay had ta git her from thar. Buster knowed when his mama an tha doc cum in tha room an was tryin hear what thay was a sayin but thay was talkin low like. All of a sudden Buster's mama started ta bawlin like a sick calf! Tha doc says he's daid! Well, Buster would have nun of that, I tell ya! He sits straight up an hollers, " I ain't daid!" Well his mama an tha doc both like ta of passed out right then an thar! After everbody got tharselfs tagather an all; Buster tole em that he could hear everthin but jes couldn't talk nun. Tha doc checked Buster over an upside down. Couldn't find a thang wrong with him neither. Course it got all over Prairie County that Buster dun expired an a miracle dun raised him from tha daid.
It jes might a ben a miracle but Buster never knowed nuthin but he couldn't talk ta nobody. Wasn't hurt a bit, not even a scratch. Reckon after Buster studied on it a spell; it was a miracle cause he wadn't hurt not one whit. Tha Lord dun sent a Guardian Angel fer him that day cause it woulda kilt a regular man.
Another time Buster was a cummin in late in his grandma's Ford he borrowed. He dun went over ta tha college at Conway ta visit sum fellers from back home. Well now, thar was a little partyin goin on but Buster didn't have but a snort or two of that Old McBrayer cause he had ta git on back fer work at tha farm. Didn't figure on sleepin much an would probably see ole Chicken Jeans cummin on mornin. Ole Chicken always had a half pint in his overalls, ya know. Buster was sober as a judge when he lit out fer home. He set that old Ford ta sail an let er bump. He skinned er back an she was a runnin fine. Got up ta bout 130 when he begin ta shuttin er down. Thar was sum bad "S" curves at Keo at tha turn off ta tha farm. Buster was kinda tired and just dozed a mite when he hit them curves. Missed tha first bend an went inta tha bar ditch; rolled er 5 times an he didn't have no seat belt on neither.
Cum ta find out ifn he did; he'd ben deader than a doornail. Throwed Buster up under tha back seat an pinned him thar till she quit a rollin. Buster didn't git a scratch from that un neither. But when he cum ta a stop he crawled out an a feller he knowed drove by an looked in on him ta see ifn he was hurt. Buster tole him naw but he needed a ride ta town. It was 5 miles ta tha house and Buster wasn't in no mood fer walkin. Tha one thang he was worried bout most wadn't grandma's Ford, but him losing tha rest of that quart of Old McBayer he took with him ta tha party! Sum more of them angels was a doin double duty a workin overtime agin he reckoned.
Then thar was tha time he was a racin stockcars at tha Benton Speedbowl. Buster was a runnin '55 an '56 Fords he souped up. Them Chevys was fast alright but Buster's Ford was too. Buster was a cumin out of turn 2 when another feller got a mite close an sent him over tha wall. Flipped er a couple three times fore she cum ta rest an only skunt up under Buster's thumnail whar it bled a bit. Well, Buster's mama was in tha grandstands a watchin him race an she like ta have had a heart spell it skeered her so much. Said she wadn't never gonna cum see Buster race agin; her heart jes couldn't take it. Buster says ta his mama, "aw mama it ain't nuthin"; thought she was gonna whack him fer a minit but she jes hugged him an tole him ta be careful like. Buster cranked er up fer that next race an was a gonna race that 7 car agin. That boy in that Chevy could drive I tell ya an his car was fast. Thay cum off tha startin line with that 7 car in tha lead but not by much. Thay had 10 laps till tha finish line. Thay was a swappin tha lead an lappin cars an bumpin each other till tha last turn. Turn 4 an then tha homestretch. Thay was in a dead heat cummin out of turn 4 an Buster an that ole boy in car 7 was a pourin tha coal ta em. Right before thay hit tha finish line, car 7 an Buster's 00 tangled. Fer sum reason Car 7 pulled hard ta tha right but Buster wouldn't give a inch; he jes shoved that pedal ta tha metal an give er all she got. Well, what a sight ta see at tha finish line! Car 7 got caught in tha left front fender well of Buster's Ford. With them hung up that way; Buster crossed tha finish line a pullin Car 7 with him. Won by a nose.
There was a time when Buster was up in Kentuck by Uncle Joe and Monie's place in Tipton Holler. Them mountains had sum tricky turns, I tell ya. Buster was in a '62 Chey he got offa his grandma when he went off ta tha University of Arkansas in Fayettville after he got out of tha service. She was a lil 283 V8, white, 4 door sedan with 3 bar, checkerboard spinners an lake pipes. If that car could talk; she'd have sum stories ta tell fer shor an not a tall tale amongst em!
Thar was tha time them fellers that stabbed him in a tussle an set fire ta her; flooded tha whole inside ta put er out. Then thar was tha time Buster was out fer a lil ride an he dun drove cross a crick. Got a lil deep an drowned out. Thar sat Buster with a wooden case of small cokes mixed with that Old McBrayer with tha water up ta his chest. He had both winders open an tha water jes flowed right on thru. Ever once in a while one of them cokes would float by an Buster would have a drink. He got drunker than Cooter Brown jes a sittin thar with tha water runnin over him in tha driver's seat. Awful glad it was warm an Summertime.
A farmer on his tractor cum by an pulled him out. Changed tha oil an cranked er up an lit out fer a hot date. That Chevy dun had her swimmin lessons, I tell ya. Anyhow, Buster had ta take over sum aigs, several dozen he recollected, from his Aunt Mae's thar outside Beattyville. Buster didn't know them roads but he was a durn good driver. He cum up on a curve that doubled back an he plum run off tha mountain. Buster called his Uncle Roscoe to cum pull him out. When he got ta Uncle Joe's place an looked in tha trunk, he expected ta see aigs ever which a place but lo an behold, not one aig was broke. Well, that curve jes didn't set right with Buster so he up an lights out ta see jes how fast he can make er. He went into her bout 40mph with it bein a 15mph curve accordin ta tha sign. Buster braked hard then give er tha gas; set er up on 2 wheels and set er back down after he cum outa that curve an lit a shuck fer town jes a grinnin. That boy can drive.
Now that brings ta mind sum of Buster's frens accidents, an sum of thar siblins too.
Walter's sisters are as purty a gals ya ever wanta meet an twice as sweet an thay ain't mentioned much ceptin fer bein courted an all. But fer shor thay git inta a pickle or two tharselfs. Walter's folks had a Chrysler station wagon car an tha gals took it one night without thar folks knowin it. Not only did thay take tha car but went outa town lettin a feller drive it. Thay was a hightailin it cross them Texas plains when thay cum up on cattle guard an slid inta it sideways when tha feller braked too hard. Wrapped plum round that tie corner post. Wonder thay wadn't kilt. Then Walter an his brothers cut tha top offa that old Chrysler station wagon an made a sand buggy outa it. It run allrite but tracked a lil east ta west caused tha frame was warped. Tha brothers used it fer huntin too an one day whilst out huntin thay got ta chasin a coyote. Walter give er tha gas an was a runnin after that coyote hot an heavy when he dun hit a buffla waller. Knocked tha wind outa all them boys an threw them that was on top outa tha buggy, guns an all. Fact is, one of them guns was stuck straight up in tha ground like sumbody chunked a spear or sumthin. Believe that was bout tha end of that Chrysler.
Kelvin an Walter was in an old Dodge that Kelvin had an was jes bout a block from tha house when Kelvin took ta waving at a feller he knowed. Danged ifn he didn't run smack dab inta a concrete culvert. Put Walter's haid plum thru tha windshield but only skunt him up a mite. That was tha end of tha Dodge too. Reckon a car didn't stand a chance with tha Ollinger girls an tha brothers. Talkin bout Guardian Angels; them Ollinger boys and girls had a few workin fer them too!
Jessie and Howard had thar share of accidents too but it plum tuckers a feller out rememberin them boys shenanigans. We'll write on em sum after a bit but danged if I can see how a tree can up an run outa tha front yard an hit your dollar van.
Buster dun had him a motor scooter accident on his Allstate when he hit the plumber, ole J. B. Locke, in tha side of his '58 Ford, 4 door sedan. It was green an white. Well ya see, Buster was a goin over ta this here feller's house fer a visit and it ain't recollected who was at fault. All is knowed is that it conked Buster's haid hard nuf ta dent tha entire side of that Ford. Throwed Buster higher than a Georgia pine, I tell ya. Tha amblance took Buster off ta tha horspital whar thay had him covered up with a white sheet. Well, Buster could hear all them folks a talkin and workin on him but he jes couldn't say nothing. He knowed he weren't hurt none but jes couldn't git on up from thar. That danged stretcher was right uncomfortable!
It dun tore up his motor scooter sumthin pitiful an put Buster in mind of bein right fractious bout that. He dun worked hard ta earn nuf money ta buy it an now it was busted up real good. Rolled an throwed many a paper fer it fer shor.
Whilst Buster was a layin thar, sum fellers cum by and says tha doctor was a cummin with Buster's mama. She was a workin out at Knoll's cleaners fer sum extra hard cash an thay had ta git her from thar. Buster knowed when his mama an tha doc cum in tha room an was tryin hear what thay was a sayin but thay was talkin low like. All of a sudden Buster's mama started ta bawlin like a sick calf! Tha doc says he's daid! Well, Buster would have nun of that, I tell ya! He sits straight up an hollers, " I ain't daid!" Well his mama an tha doc both like ta of passed out right then an thar! After everbody got tharselfs tagather an all; Buster tole em that he could hear everthin but jes couldn't talk nun. Tha doc checked Buster over an upside down. Couldn't find a thang wrong with him neither. Course it got all over Prairie County that Buster dun expired an a miracle dun raised him from tha daid.
It jes might a ben a miracle but Buster never knowed nuthin but he couldn't talk ta nobody. Wasn't hurt a bit, not even a scratch. Reckon after Buster studied on it a spell; it was a miracle cause he wadn't hurt not one whit. Tha Lord dun sent a Guardian Angel fer him that day cause it woulda kilt a regular man.
Another time Buster was a cummin in late in his grandma's Ford he borrowed. He dun went over ta tha college at Conway ta visit sum fellers from back home. Well now, thar was a little partyin goin on but Buster didn't have but a snort or two of that Old McBrayer cause he had ta git on back fer work at tha farm. Didn't figure on sleepin much an would probably see ole Chicken Jeans cummin on mornin. Ole Chicken always had a half pint in his overalls, ya know. Buster was sober as a judge when he lit out fer home. He set that old Ford ta sail an let er bump. He skinned er back an she was a runnin fine. Got up ta bout 130 when he begin ta shuttin er down. Thar was sum bad "S" curves at Keo at tha turn off ta tha farm. Buster was kinda tired and just dozed a mite when he hit them curves. Missed tha first bend an went inta tha bar ditch; rolled er 5 times an he didn't have no seat belt on neither.
Cum ta find out ifn he did; he'd ben deader than a doornail. Throwed Buster up under tha back seat an pinned him thar till she quit a rollin. Buster didn't git a scratch from that un neither. But when he cum ta a stop he crawled out an a feller he knowed drove by an looked in on him ta see ifn he was hurt. Buster tole him naw but he needed a ride ta town. It was 5 miles ta tha house and Buster wasn't in no mood fer walkin. Tha one thang he was worried bout most wadn't grandma's Ford, but him losing tha rest of that quart of Old McBayer he took with him ta tha party! Sum more of them angels was a doin double duty a workin overtime agin he reckoned.
Then thar was tha time he was a racin stockcars at tha Benton Speedbowl. Buster was a runnin '55 an '56 Fords he souped up. Them Chevys was fast alright but Buster's Ford was too. Buster was a cumin out of turn 2 when another feller got a mite close an sent him over tha wall. Flipped er a couple three times fore she cum ta rest an only skunt up under Buster's thumnail whar it bled a bit. Well, Buster's mama was in tha grandstands a watchin him race an she like ta have had a heart spell it skeered her so much. Said she wadn't never gonna cum see Buster race agin; her heart jes couldn't take it. Buster says ta his mama, "aw mama it ain't nuthin"; thought she was gonna whack him fer a minit but she jes hugged him an tole him ta be careful like. Buster cranked er up fer that next race an was a gonna race that 7 car agin. That boy in that Chevy could drive I tell ya an his car was fast. Thay cum off tha startin line with that 7 car in tha lead but not by much. Thay had 10 laps till tha finish line. Thay was a swappin tha lead an lappin cars an bumpin each other till tha last turn. Turn 4 an then tha homestretch. Thay was in a dead heat cummin out of turn 4 an Buster an that ole boy in car 7 was a pourin tha coal ta em. Right before thay hit tha finish line, car 7 an Buster's 00 tangled. Fer sum reason Car 7 pulled hard ta tha right but Buster wouldn't give a inch; he jes shoved that pedal ta tha metal an give er all she got. Well, what a sight ta see at tha finish line! Car 7 got caught in tha left front fender well of Buster's Ford. With them hung up that way; Buster crossed tha finish line a pullin Car 7 with him. Won by a nose.
There was a time when Buster was up in Kentuck by Uncle Joe and Monie's place in Tipton Holler. Them mountains had sum tricky turns, I tell ya. Buster was in a '62 Chey he got offa his grandma when he went off ta tha University of Arkansas in Fayettville after he got out of tha service. She was a lil 283 V8, white, 4 door sedan with 3 bar, checkerboard spinners an lake pipes. If that car could talk; she'd have sum stories ta tell fer shor an not a tall tale amongst em!
Thar was tha time them fellers that stabbed him in a tussle an set fire ta her; flooded tha whole inside ta put er out. Then thar was tha time Buster was out fer a lil ride an he dun drove cross a crick. Got a lil deep an drowned out. Thar sat Buster with a wooden case of small cokes mixed with that Old McBrayer with tha water up ta his chest. He had both winders open an tha water jes flowed right on thru. Ever once in a while one of them cokes would float by an Buster would have a drink. He got drunker than Cooter Brown jes a sittin thar with tha water runnin over him in tha driver's seat. Awful glad it was warm an Summertime.
A farmer on his tractor cum by an pulled him out. Changed tha oil an cranked er up an lit out fer a hot date. That Chevy dun had her swimmin lessons, I tell ya. Anyhow, Buster had ta take over sum aigs, several dozen he recollected, from his Aunt Mae's thar outside Beattyville. Buster didn't know them roads but he was a durn good driver. He cum up on a curve that doubled back an he plum run off tha mountain. Buster called his Uncle Roscoe to cum pull him out. When he got ta Uncle Joe's place an looked in tha trunk, he expected ta see aigs ever which a place but lo an behold, not one aig was broke. Well, that curve jes didn't set right with Buster so he up an lights out ta see jes how fast he can make er. He went into her bout 40mph with it bein a 15mph curve accordin ta tha sign. Buster braked hard then give er tha gas; set er up on 2 wheels and set er back down after he cum outa that curve an lit a shuck fer town jes a grinnin. That boy can drive.
Now that brings ta mind sum of Buster's frens accidents, an sum of thar siblins too.
Walter's sisters are as purty a gals ya ever wanta meet an twice as sweet an thay ain't mentioned much ceptin fer bein courted an all. But fer shor thay git inta a pickle or two tharselfs. Walter's folks had a Chrysler station wagon car an tha gals took it one night without thar folks knowin it. Not only did thay take tha car but went outa town lettin a feller drive it. Thay was a hightailin it cross them Texas plains when thay cum up on cattle guard an slid inta it sideways when tha feller braked too hard. Wrapped plum round that tie corner post. Wonder thay wadn't kilt. Then Walter an his brothers cut tha top offa that old Chrysler station wagon an made a sand buggy outa it. It run allrite but tracked a lil east ta west caused tha frame was warped. Tha brothers used it fer huntin too an one day whilst out huntin thay got ta chasin a coyote. Walter give er tha gas an was a runnin after that coyote hot an heavy when he dun hit a buffla waller. Knocked tha wind outa all them boys an threw them that was on top outa tha buggy, guns an all. Fact is, one of them guns was stuck straight up in tha ground like sumbody chunked a spear or sumthin. Believe that was bout tha end of that Chrysler.
Kelvin an Walter was in an old Dodge that Kelvin had an was jes bout a block from tha house when Kelvin took ta waving at a feller he knowed. Danged ifn he didn't run smack dab inta a concrete culvert. Put Walter's haid plum thru tha windshield but only skunt him up a mite. That was tha end of tha Dodge too. Reckon a car didn't stand a chance with tha Ollinger girls an tha brothers. Talkin bout Guardian Angels; them Ollinger boys and girls had a few workin fer them too!
Jessie and Howard had thar share of accidents too but it plum tuckers a feller out rememberin them boys shenanigans. We'll write on em sum after a bit but danged if I can see how a tree can up an run outa tha front yard an hit your dollar van.
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